Mead's I and Me

Explore how George Herbert Mead saw the self growing through other people.

  • Define and explain Mead's I and Me in your own words
  • Use key terms such as The generalised other accurately
  • Apply what you have learned to new examples and questions
  • Avoid the common mistakes learners make with this topic

This lesson focuses on Mead's I and Me: explore how George Herbert Mead saw the self growing through other people.

Definition: Mead's I and Me

Explore how George Herbert Mead saw the self growing through other people.

Key ideas

The I and the me

George Herbert Mead argued in Mind, Self, and Society (1934) that the self has two parts formed through interaction. The me is the self as an object: how we imagine others see us, built up from the attitudes of particular people and eventually the generalised other. The I is the spontaneous, acting self that responds to the me, the source of creativity and unpredictability. For Mead, we become selves only by seeing ourselves through others' eyes.

Secondary socialisation never stops

From the first day of school, new agents take over part of the teaching: teachers and the hidden curriculum of rules and routines, peer groups with their fierce codes of cool, and the media with its flood of images and stories. Peer groups become especially powerful in the teenage years, sometimes pulling young people away from family values. Workplaces, partners and religions continue the process deep into adult life.

Key term — The generalised other: Mead's term for our internalised sense of what society in general expects of us, which we use to guide our behaviour.

Learning the Playground Rules

Imagine a five-year-old, Amara, starts school. Within weeks she queues for lunch, shares equipment and comforts a crying classmate. Which agents of socialisation taught her what, and where does Mead's me appear?

Step 1: Credit primary socialisation: her family taught her language, kindness and basic right and wrong. Step 2: Credit secondary socialisation: the school taught queuing and sharing through routines and teacher praise. Step 3: Credit peers: other children taught her the unwritten playground codes through inclusion and disapproval. Step 4: Spot the me: when Amara imagines how her classmates will judge her before she acts, she is using her internalised generalised other.

Answer: Amara's behaviour is a joint product: family laid the primary foundations, while school and peers added secondary lessons. Her me, the self seen through others' eyes, now guides her playground conduct before she even moves.

Common mistakes
  • Calling the I the selfish part of the self In Mead's theory the I is simply the spontaneous, acting self that responds; it is the source of creativity, not of selfishness.
  • Assuming the media has no real effect The media is a major secondary agent, shaping ideas about beauty, success and normality, especially for young people.

Practice

Explain Mead's distinction between the I and the me.
One acts, the other is seen.

The me is the self as an object, how we think others see us, built from the generalised other; the I is the spontaneous acting self that responds to the me.

Name four agents of socialisation.
Start at home, then move outward.

Any four of: family, school, peer group, media, religion, workplace.

What is the difference between primary and secondary socialisation?
Think first lessons versus later lessons.

Primary socialisation is the first, intense learning of basic norms and values in the family; secondary socialisation is later learning from school, peers, media and others.

A teenager starts dressing like her new friends and arguing with her parents' views. Which agent is at work, and is this primary or secondary socialisation?
Which group becomes powerful in the teens?

The peer group, and this is secondary socialisation, which can challenge primary lessons from the family.

Quick check

Mead's I and Me — quick check

Which of these best defines "The generalised other"?

Mead's term for our internalised sense of what society in general expects of us, which we use to guide our behaviour.

An adult moves abroad for work and must learn new greetings, food customs and workplace norms. What does this show about socialisation?

It shows socialisation continues throughout life: adults learn new roles and norms whenever they enter new cultures or situations.

Give one example of the hidden curriculum at school.

Any valid example, e.g. learning punctuality, obedience to authority, competition, or gendered expectations through routines and teacher behaviour.
Key takeaways
  • Mead's I and Me: explore how George Herbert Mead saw the self growing through other people.
  • The I and the me: George Herbert Mead argued in Mind, Self, and Society (1934) that the self has two parts formed through interaction.
  • Primary socialisation: The first and most intense stage of socialisation, usually in the family, where a child learns language, basic norms and fundamental values.
  • Watch out for: calling the I the selfish part of the self